What Went Wrong?
Our discussion to this point has alluded to but casually sidestepped an important issue that often pits new breeders against oldrespect. New breeders want it, old breeders expect it, and in the struggle that ensues sometimes neither get it. Respect is a multi-faceted emotion and has several applications in the dog world. While tomes could be written about why each group deserves it innately, the truth is they don't. In the end respect is earned, not demanded, despite our protestations to the contrary.
That said, once you have chosen a mentor it is imperative that rather than simply paying lip service to their accomplishments, you take the time to understand what sets them apart. Good judgment, sound breeding strategies, experience with their lines and a good eye for a dog all amount to wonderful opportunities for a new breederbut if he/she doesn't choose to take advantage of these attributes, who suffers in the end?
As we discussed previously, a lack of trust can have harsh repercussions in the relationship between a mentor and student. But just as the mentor must trust those they try to help, new breeders must sometimes trust their teacher.
In this case, Marjorie's actions speak much louder than her words. While she was apparently willing to take advantage of the surface knowledge Bill offered, when it came down to trusting his judgment and experience she wasn't willing to make the leap. She did not take advantage of the opportunity to access her mentor's knowledge about the breed, its typical development patterns or his experience in similar situations. Worse, her failure to discuss her feelings with her mentor when making an important decision like this flew in the face of the very mentorship she professed to value.
This is not to say that Marjorie is not entitled to disagree with Billtrust and respect doesn't for an instant mean blindly followingonly that effective mentorships require meaningful discussions of real issues as they happen. Such discussions can lead to valuable learning opportunities for both parties. Because she wasn't willing to respect the opinion of her mentor enough to even discuss the issue with him, Marjorie lost out on an opportunity to learn, lost out on a potentially great bitch and, most importantly, lost her mentor.
It's Hopeless!
Having read this series you are probably asking yourself one questionwhy bother? Mentorships, from the sounds of it, aren't worth it in the end. Not true.Page 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5