If Ryan Seacrest came back as a dog, he'd be Sterling Sugar Magnolia, the sassy canine narrator of The Complete Petrosexual: A Handbook of Style for the Modern Dog.

While Ryan, who fans know as the first so-called metrosexual, directs most of his biting fashion commentary to the not-so-stylish Simon Cowell, Sterling takes aim at her fellow fashionista dogs: Holiday-themed clothes? Seasonal frou-frou will never be in fashion, growls Sterling. Where to sleep? Do not, under any circumstances, allow your human to think it is okay for you to sleep on the floor. Collar vs. harness? Harnesses can make one look quite pudgy, if one is not careful.

And, like the Idol judges and Carson Kressley from Queer Eye for the Straight Guy, Sterlings funny and frank opinions don't end there. She riffs on everything from mutt makeovers to the most dire fashion faux paws. Now if she could just do something about our dogs penchant for slobbering.

Posted: April 24, 2006, 5 a.m. EST